Sunday, January 10, 2016

If Rudyard Kipling Drove A Truck.

If you can keep you head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you
If you know all there is about an air brake
And can pass the test that you must take
If you can endure days of desperation
Brought on by a week of orientation
If you just need a map to find your way
To drive a thousand kays a day.

If you can handle any rig that anyone's made
And run the back roads so you don't get weighed
If you can sidestep every speeding fine
And still make deliveries just in time
If you can sit overnight at a lonely border
While customs gets its house in order
If you can drive all night and have no fear
Of the eventual strike of a moose or deer.

If you have the patience not to explode
When it takes all day just to load
If you know the way to say it with flowers
When you go again in thirty-six hours
If you can throw on chains when needs be
Or drive across a desert with no a/c

If you can make a log look correct
To fool all of those who need to check
If you can change a filter at minus thirty
With no second thought of getting dirty
If you can ignore despatchers' games
And smile at the arseholes just the same

If you can survive the stabs in the back
And con yourself "it's just for the craic"
If you can take all this in and think for a minute
Yours is Canada and everything that's in it
Fly on over and join in the fun
And - which is more - you'll be a trucker my son.

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